This time of year, like many people, I begin to think more about transitions. I see transitions happening around me as the leaves change and eventually fall. The beauty and the loss. The beautiful change in the color of the leaves also signals some death. It seems that most (all?) change contains some loss. We may lose a negative pattern, a healthy pattern, a friendship, a toxic relationship, warmth, coolness. Whether we perceive the loss as positive or negative, it’s still a loss. A change.
I think about transitions in relationships as I’ve grown and learned more about God and myself over the years. Beauty and loss as I navigate those relationships with honesty. I think about transitions in different jobs I’ve had over the years. Beauty and loss as I say good-bye to familiar work and join new work. I think about transitions in moving to different homes. Beauty and loss as I meet new neighbors, hear new sounds in my home, say good-bye to a place where memories were made. With every change there is a mix of beauty and loss. So, what good does it do to think about the beauty and the loss? For me, it helps to face reality and understand some of the internal tension I’m vaguely feeling. By facing the truth, I can more fully move into the present. By grieving and acknowledging the losses, I can more fully embrace the beauty of the change.
Right now, I’m in a transitional place in a relationship. We are relating differently. The changes are all good – even something we’ve both wanted. But, I’m also saying good-bye to how things have always been done, how I have defaulted in relating. As we renegotiate this relationship, I’ll make mistakes, take tentative steps, over-think things and try to trust the mutual love and respect.
What about you? What change are you experiencing? Do you see both the beauty and the loss in that change?